i am

"Who could be so lucky? Who comes to a lake for water and sees the reflection of the moon." Rumi


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One Year In

E942593_10151395495651607_1514799709_nFourteen days ago I received a notification about my One Year Anniversary with WordPress! One year and 14 days ago, I was convinced I knew what I was trying to achieve with this blog. But now, I’m not so sure and it feels great because I don’t have the headache of having to find the right topics, photographs or poems to specifically post on my blog. One year and 14 days ago I wrote my first post about which I smile every time I read. I was attempting to reach enlightenment through what? I now realize it’s not a goal you reach and then move on to the next. It’s self discovery from every level forever. It’s being aware of life knowing not all the answers yet remaining peaceful and being faithful that whatever the outcome should be, it will provide room for growth and wisdom.

Here’s an (un)apologetically short synopsis of the year before my blog began, the year during, and the beginning of another year into the blog.

  • 2011 was the start of a season that I would have never imagined. Coming out of a long term relationship, i engaged in a culture of artistic social gatherings, slowly crawling out of a shell that hid many talents and gifts I was blessed with.  I built many strong connections with whom I would be working with today, supporting one another in many ways.
  • 2012 was my real awakening, involving dismay, pain, frustration, (re)connection, fasting, appreciation, gratefulness, broken relationships, bonds built, fuller awareness, etc… It marked the beginning of a new life with different perspectives and a clearer mindset. It opened me up to tolerating, respecting and appreciating different religions, including participating in different rituals and practices from several belief systems that inevitably have expanded my growth.
  • 2013 is coming into bloom. This year is the year that my changes from 2012 will find their space to dwell in. A year of decision and action.

Like I stated in my previous post, I’ve been absent a lot more than I was last year. But I wont be gone for too long. I’m grateful for the connections I’ve made throughout the year, the wonderful souls that have blessed me with their knowledge, their accounts of experience, their art, their stories, their philosophies, etc. I’ve learned many things from all of you. Yes i’m referring to all of you who’ve inspired, motivated and supported me thus far through my blog and yours. I’m also very humbled to have been awarded many times for my blog throughout the year. I thank you all from the bottom of my heart.

Peace, blessings and love always ♥,

your Moon in full 🙂

 


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Fellow bloggers, readers, friends and family,

I have neglected you. I miss my days of ranting and rambling, provoking thoughts and amateur photography. How I long to interact with you on a deeper cyber-galactic level, to share my experiences, thoughts, dreams and well, my art. I apologize for diluting my posts these past several months. I’ve replaced your pulp-filled natural juice glass with ordinary sugar water, but you deserve fresh linguistic concoctions of reflections with a healthy dose of inspiration and a dash of insanity. Life must take its course though, and as of late, the wind has blown me in different directions. I promise to not leave you permanently, to make up for the time I have been away in other ventures. But know that you hold a special place in the vast, warm ocean that is my heart.

Sincerely,

The one and only Moon

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Ready for a world tour

The empty auditorium was to be inhabited by thousands. A handful of us with worn out jazz shoes, leg warmers, sweat shirts & pants twirled ’till the stage spun on its own. Some stretched and others meditated in corpse pose as i chugged water from an almost empty bottle.

“We cant stop now, last practice!” A familiar soft-spoken but firm voice gave command from the entrance door. He was dressed in a white v-neck, cropped black pants with white socks and black shoes – oh! And his legendary glove. Michael Jackson showed up for the last night of practice of what was to be the first show of his last tour. He was kind, energetic and motivational.

I was stoked! I still couldn’t believe i was going on tour with MICHAEL JACKSON. But now i’m at work, reminiscing one of my coolest dreams to date.

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Anticipation

He caressed my mind
Just as my heart began to open.
Like a thief jn the night
He cleverly awoke me with his declarations,
Snuck deep into dark wounds
Despite his limitations –
These lesions slowly dissipate into haze.
But with not a single gaze,
How’d he know to get in?

Penetrating my thoughts,
He’s become a pro at deciphering
The moods my soul swings to;
And as my heart he pursues,
He causes a fluttering that knows no harm.
Unarmed, I give in gradually
But hesitantly.
Should I? Should I not?
Why not?

Reasoning with a lack of reasons,
A case I’m unable to state
For the places I’ve been
Compare not to the places he’s seen
Through dreams which enchant a morrow
He knows will ensue pleasure and ease.
His love has instantly become immeasurable
As he unravels a knot that choked
Me for far too long with a memoir
That would otherwise have no end.

There’s a sunrise in his lingo
And a misty coolness that oozes
Its way into my core –
I wonder if this sensation
Will whistle past the graveyard.
Mmm, raindrops taste like sweet persimmons
Every time the thought of him lingers in my senses-
Delicate and subtle;
But I anticipate encountering in the physical
For it shall confirm what my visions
Have alluded to as I patiently wait.
Ah, to anticipate forever through a single soul.


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A poetic conversation

Him:  Clear is your voice

Like crystals that shatter

When you scatter the silence

And that’s when I can see the light

Shine through a prism you created

HerA light so bright as if directly from Source

My warmth is stimulated

Like the solar plexus massaged with mustard oil

It’s invigorating

Him:  So different, the colors, when you’re elated

That beam and seem to bring dreams to reality

HerElated by a prose so smooth

It slides from one realm of existence

Into another

A mist that encompasses most aspects

Of joy never thought possible


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A New Season

Tis such a busy season. I’m taking some time off  between work to write because I have many thoughts in my head and wish to share with you. I’ve been learning some new lessons; well, still in the process, but I’ve become aware of some weaknesses that have been put to the test lately.

“Patience does not mean to passively endure. It means to be farsighted enough to trust the end result of a process.” -Rumi

  1. Patience: I am currently working on becoming creative in the ways I will make money. My job is not my career, much less my passion. Accounting, it’s good to know, but it isn’t something I actually enjoy doing. I’m glad I have this knowledge though because it will benefit me for my future plans. I truly want to become more flexible with my time; I want to become more available to do the things I enjoy doing, and do so while increasing cash flow. I have a plan and it’s somewhat in the works. But it’s taking longer than expected and a bit more complicated than I originally thought. However, it’s teaching me patience. It’s teaching me that anything worth doing takes time in the making. Vegetable blossoms don’t grow overnight. So I realize this gives me time to organize my thoughts and even write an outline of my plans. (I’m not very disciplined but am learning how to be).

“This discipline and rough treatment are a furnace to extract the silver from the dross. This testing purifies the gold by boiling the scum away.” – Rumi

  1. Discipline: I’m realizing that especially in a fast-paced society, discipline and structure are actually very necessary. Many people repel those words because they automatically associate them with restrictions, like I once did until now. Does a tree not have structure in its growth and sustainability? Is there no structure in pollination? Is there no structure with our internal organs? Is discipline not a way of organizing oneself to simply follow through with goals or even chores? Well, I tend to have many unfinished goals and my chores pile up ever so often. I’m also realizing that having a full-time job and being an artist is quite a lot to juggle. There are many activities that I feel are necessary for my growth, and juggling work and late night events takes a toll on me. For example, how do I fit in my reading, poem memorization,  meditation, exercise and food-planning with work and performances? I feel pressured to maintain and increase my efficacy at work whilst maintaining and increasing my artistic presence in the local scene as well. I’m working on finding a balance between all things, and it just might mean sacrifice.

“O, happy the soul that saw its own faults.” – Rumi

  1. Ego: Man, I never thought any situation would ever affect me in a way that would ‘hurt’ my ego. And well, I have a confession: I actually feel a bit threatened by someone who was brought into work over the weekend. As most of you all know, I am the only employee among three CPA partners, e.g. my bosses. A young lady was brought in to help me out through this busy season, but I felt offended and a bit threatened. I forgot what it’s like to have co-workers and have not dealt with the competition that goes on in the workplace and have not been in a ‘survival of the fittest’ mode in a long time. Now, don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I’m not accepting of her, but now she presents another option for my bosses should her work efficiency surpass mine, and being that she’s studying accounting, she may just have more oomph in the way she works because it’s something I assume she feels passionate about. I was finding every reason to point out how illogical her ‘temporary’ contract would be. I was disappointed and stressed. Then I realized my ego is really taking a hit. Why would I be against someone else’s progress? She needs the experience and possibly the job as well. I confided in two people whom their opinions I value. And then I saw this situation through different lens and decided that now, more than ever, I have to focus on those plans I spoke of earlier. Perhaps it is my time to finally move on and allow someone else to grow but not without a strategic plan that will allow me to ascend however this situation may play out.

 

I’m feeling way better than I was this and last week. I’m feeling optimistic this morning, looking forward to my new chapter. A plethora of developmental changes awaits me yet again!

Ah, self-growth, a never-ending journey.


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Let’s Be Fit (music & poetry?)

Well, here is something a friend of mine experimented with back in late 2011. I finally have it on Sound Cloud, and well, I finally have a Sound Cloud account, which I plan to use often (as soon as I get some recording done)

It is one of my favorite pieces, Let’s Be Fit mixed in with music.

Just click the link and hope you guys enjoy!